2011

Wow. New year, another year older, and still plunking along.

i'm on the mend, the last of the cold finally lifting, my shoulder/back pain beginning to let up, and hopefully, Master and i can squeeze in some serious fun before school starts again in 11 days.

A lot of things that we were hoping to accomplish while i was on break just didn't happen. It's been kind of aggravating in that regard. While Master noted that i mentioned an interest in getting back to the anal training, and supposed it was just so that i could get Him to drop it entirely, that isn't actually the case. While i'm not enjoying it, nor particularly thrilled about it, it's something that He has asked (told) me to do...so i'm doing my best to give it a fair try, to not whinge about it, and otherwise comply with my Master's orders.

And while nothing fun has happened since last year (whine) i'm riding that horrible edge of need, and thinking of all the lovely cruel things Master is capable of, and knowing that if we get a few hours to ourselves, He will do them and i will wonder why i wanted Him to do those horrible things while He's doing them. Afterwards, i'll know why. But during, not so much. i've been fantasizing about electrical play, canes, paddles, playing cards and clothespins, rope, leather, chains and the inability to answer the infernal questions He asks after He's gagged me...

(sigh) Maybe soon.

i'm sure you'll notice the changes to the blog's design - i like playing with layouts, and was looking forward to a change, and with the new year, it seemed a great time to change it. Now, if Master doesn't like it, well...you might see a few more changes.

Confinement

Ah, a moment to breathe.

And i mean that in a very literal sense -- Master loves his breath play. And if it's His hands, i love it too.

There's been lots of talk about confinement, caging and shelving out and about on the kinky web this week. At least it seems like it. And i always wonder what it might be like somewhat longer term. Master and i have a cage, which we purchased from Petsmart for, as Master told the cashier, a very large, bad dog. i've slept in it over night a time or two, spent several hours of my day in it...

But i think eight hours is pretty much where my time in it has been topped out. And on one hand, i am relieved. Being caged for more than a few hours definitely kinks up my muscles, causing me to feel like i am still caged even after Master has let me out. On the other, how much more agonizing might it be if it was ten hours? How about 12? Or 24? Or (gods help me) 72? How could i "disappear" for that long?

Unfortunately, neither Master or i have the time to do that. And we're extremely possessive of each other, of the rare moments where we can exist without the pressures of our lives, the moments where Master and slave are just that, not Master/daddy/writer/son/brother/worker and slave/mommy/daughter/sister/student... So justifying time where i've been "put away" when i could be doing any other slavish thing under the sun is not easy for us.

But the idea is hot. Like, "hawt" hot.

Little Glass Marbles...

If we could live in the fantasy that fills our hearts and minds, then jenpet would live in a perpetual state of metal restraints and chains, kept in a concrete cell or iron cage until needed to serve any of the infinite desires of my heart.
The realities of life however allow for very little. Even the most basic and practical of matters must, by necessity, be simplified to the utmost.

In our fantasy life, punishments would be a serious matter, punctuated by time for the naughty slave to contemplate the seriousness of her situation, preferably chained by a short length to the wall sharing quality time with the intimate implement of her coming punishment just out of reach yet imposing. The bondage, slow and methodical, each strap inescapably sealing her fate. The infractions laid out, each counted and addressed, her knowing full well the why of her correction. Then the punishment itself, harsh, measured, each strike counted by the girl with tearful sobs. There would be an aftermath, jenpet on her knees, kissing the implement and my feet in gratitude for the TLC (tender loving caning) and the chance to be corrected to become better. Then swept up into my arms to be held and reassured that she is a good girl and that all is forgiven. Ah fantasy, my dear friend and frequently absent companion.

The reality of our punishments are far less impressive. Quick swats taken in stolen moments of the child's naps, a frantic attempt to maintain some semblance of correction for forgotten infractions.
Nothing like telling the slave, "now, you've been a naughty girl."
"What have i done, Master?"
"Oh... you know... that thing the other day... Yeah that." SWAT!

Yet, we find a way. A simple method for marking infractions to be dealt with later? A glass cup filled with glass marbles, one marble for each infraction. Tonight, we had the opportunity to catch up on some of these marbles. With the little one down, we rushed upstairs, quickly bound the girl up, and got a start. Oh there was tearful counting and the loud slap of the paddle. Thirteen strikes to bring the girl back in line and empty the cup.

We do what we can and though its not easy, if it were would it be worth doing?